Words Matter: What Are We Teaching Our Children?

As moms, one of our greatest responsibilities isn't just raising healthy or successful children—it's raising kind children.

In today's world, it's easy to notice what's different about someone else.

Whether it's a person’s appearance, abilities, the way they speak, or how they behave, people often make comments without realizing the impact their words can have.

As a special needs mom, I've experienced this firsthand.

My Daughter's Story

My youngest daughter, Amiah, was born weighing only 4 pounds, 9 ounces. Because of her congenital heart defect and other medical challenges, feeding was incredibly difficult. She spent nearly three months in the hospital between the NICU and CVICU.

During that time, she developed feeding difficulties after being intubated for nearly a month.

To ensure she received the nutrition she needed, she was given a G-tube and started on a high-calorie formula to help her gain weight.

When she finally came home, she weighed only about eight pounds.

Everywhere we went, people commented on how tiny she was.

While I knew most people meant no harm, it was hard hearing those remarks when I knew everything she had already overcome.

Before Amiah's second open-heart surgery, her surgeon wanted her to gain as much weight as possible. The formula and G-tube feedings did exactly what they were supposed to do.

By eight months old, she weighed 18 pounds and was finally ready for her complete heart repair.

Then the comments changed.

Instead of hearing how small she was, people began saying how big she had gotten.

Those comments actually bothered me more.

Not because she had gained weight, but because every pound represented months of hospital stays, medications, tube feedings, doctor's appointments, prayers, and God's faithfulness.

What others saw as "big," I saw as a miracle.

The comments were especially difficult when they came from people who knew our story.

That's when I realized something important:

We never truly know what someone else is going through.

It Starts at Home

This experience changed the way I speak about other children, and it's something I'm intentionally teaching my oldest daughter.

Every person is uniquely created by God. Some people are smaller. Some are bigger. Some have disabilities you can see, while others have challenges you can't.

No matter the differences, we don't point them out or make someone feel uncomfortable because of them.

Instead, we choose kindness.

We choose compassion.

We choose respect.

Raising Kind Kids

Bullying has become far too common, and I believe it often starts with what children hear and see at home.

Our kids are always watching us. They hear how we talk about others, notice the comments we make, and learn from the example we set.

Those lessons don't stop at school—they carry over to social media and every interaction they have with others.

If we want to raise compassionate children, we have to model compassion ourselves.

A Challenge for Every Mom

Before making a comment about someone else, ask yourself:

"Do I know their story?"

Most of the time, the answer is no.

Instead of pointing out differences, choose encouragement.

Instead of making assumptions, choose grace.

Mommas, if there's one thing I hope you take away from this post, it's this:

Teach your children to be respectful, compassionate, and kind—but remember, it starts with you.

The words we choose today help shape the hearts of the next generation.

"Do to others as you would have them do to you." — Luke 6:31 (NIV)