You Can Love God and Still Have Hard Days

A year ago this week, my family and I were walking through one of the hardest weeks of our lives.

My daughter was facing a very complex medical situation, and as her mother, I wanted to do what mothers do.

Fix it.

I wanted to find the answer.

I wanted to make the right decision.

I wanted to protect my baby.

I wanted to take away what she was going through.

I wanted to somehow make everything okay.

I asked questions. I searched for answers. I advocated.

I prayed. I worried. I tried to understand things that were completely outside of my control.

And eventually, I had to face one of the hardest truths for a mother to accept:

There was nothing else I could do.

I had done everything that was within my power.

And now I had to release what was completely outside of my power and place it into God's hands.

When Trust Is Your Only Option

It's easy to say, “I trust God,” when we can see what He's doing.

It's much harder when you're standing in a situation where you don't know what tomorrow will bring.

A year ago, I didn't have all the answers.

I couldn't control the outcome.

I couldn't promise my daughter that everything would happen exactly the way I wanted it to.

All I could do was trust God.

And that sounds beautiful when you write it down.

But living it?

Living it was hard.

Trusting God didn't mean I wasn't afraid.

It didn't mean I didn't cry.

It didn't mean I didn't have questions.

It didn't mean there weren't moments when I wished desperately that I could take control of the entire situation myself.

It meant that even with all of those emotions, I still chose to place my daughter in God's hands.

I Had to Release Her

There is something incredibly difficult about realizing that, as a parent, you cannot protect your child from everything.

We want to believe that if we research enough, advocate enough, work hard enough, pray enough, or find the right person with the right answer, we can somehow control what happens next.

But sometimes we reach a place where there is nothing left for us to do.

That's where I was.

I had to tell God:

“She's Yours.”

Those words weren't me giving up on my daughter.

They were me giving up the illusion that I was ever truly in control.

There is a difference between giving up and giving it to God.

Giving up says, “There's no hope.”

Surrender says, “God, my hope is in You.”

I had reached the end of what my hands could do.

So I had to trust the One whose hands were greater than mine.

For a long time, I think we sometimes make faith sound like Christians aren't supposed to be afraid.

Like if we really trust God, we shouldn't cry.

We shouldn't worry.

We shouldn't have questions.

We should simply pray, smile, and confidently say, “God's got it.”

But I learned something during that week.

You can know God's got it and still be scared.

You can trust God and still cry.

You can pray and still have questions.

You can believe in God's goodness while simultaneously wishing He would change the situation you're facing.

You can have faith and still have a hard day.

Those things can exist together.

When I think about that week now, I don't remember myself as some fearless woman who handled everything perfectly.

I remember a mother who was scared.

A mother who wanted answers.

A mother who desperately wanted her child to be okay.

A mother who prayed.

And a mother who eventually realized:

I cannot carry this anymore.

So I gave it to God.

Not because I suddenly understood everything.

Not because all my fear disappeared.

Not because I knew exactly what the outcome would be.

I surrendered because I knew I couldn't do it without Him.

Proverbs 3:5–6 says:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” — Proverbs 3:5–6 (NKJV)

That Scripture means something different when you're living through a situation you genuinely don't understand.

Sometimes trusting God means admitting:

“God, I don't understand this at all. But I trust You anyway.”

Now, a year later, this week carries a different weight for me.

It reminds me of how quickly life can change.

It reminds me how little control we actually have.

But most importantly, it reminds me of what happens when we reach the end of ourselves and realize God was never asking us to carry everything alone.

I wish I could say that experience taught me to never worry again.

It didn't.

I'm still a mother.

I still want to protect my children.

I still have moments when I try to figure everything out before remembering to pray.

I still have hard days.

But now I have something else too.

A reminder.

A reminder that I've been in situations before where I couldn't see what was ahead.

A reminder that I've prayed prayers when I didn't know what else to say.

A reminder that I've had to release what I loved most into God's hands.

And a reminder that He was there.

Maybe you're reading this while facing something you cannot fix.

Maybe it's your child.

Your marriage.

Your finances.

Your health.

Your family.

Your career.

Or something you've been praying about for so long that you're exhausted from trying to figure out how it's going to work.

Maybe you've done everything you know how to do.

If that's where you are, I want to remind you of what I had to learn:

You are not required to have the answer to trust God.

Sometimes the most faithful thing you can do is admit:

“God, I've done everything I know to do. I can't control what happens next. So I'm giving this to You.”

Then release it.

Not because you don't care.

But because you care so deeply that you've finally realized the weight was never yours to carry alone.

You Can Love God and Still Have Hard Days

A year ago this week, I loved God.

And I was scared.

I trusted God.

And I cried.

I believed He was good.

And I desperately wanted my circumstances to change.

My faith didn't erase my emotions.

My faith gave me somewhere to take them.

And maybe that's what someone else needs to hear today.

You don't have to pretend you're okay to prove that you trust God.

You don't have to understand everything He's doing.

You don't have to have tomorrow figured out.

Do what you can.

Advocate.

Ask questions.

Show up.

Pray.

Love fiercely.

And when you've done everything your hands can possibly do...

open them.

Release what you're holding.

And trust God with the rest.

A Prayer for the Things We Cannot Control

Heavenly Father,

Sometimes I want to control everything because I'm afraid of what might happen if I don't.

You know the people I love. You know the situations keeping me awake at night. You know every question I have and every answer I'm desperately searching for.

Give me wisdom to know when I need to act and faith to recognize when I've done all I can do.

When I reach the end of my strength, remind me that I have not reached the end of Yours.

Help me release the things I cannot control.

Help me trust You even when I'm scared.

Help me remember that surrender isn't giving up. It's placing what I love into the hands of the One who loves them even more than I do.

Today, I release what I cannot fix.

I release what I cannot predict.

I release what I cannot control.

I trust You with it.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

Beautiful Truth:

Sometimes faith isn't believing that everything will happen the way you want it to. Sometimes faith is doing everything you can, opening your hands, and saying, “God, I can't control what happens next—but I trust You.”